It is impossible to live and work in Russia and escape these holidays. So here is our Idiot’s Guide for how to make it through this spring madness, and we’re not even talking about Easter yet.
Red Army and Men’s Day
The 23rd of February is the birthday of the Red Army. Until the late 80's, there was virtually no one who hadn’t served in the Army. So it’s no surprise that Red Army Day smoothly transformed into Father’s Day and then to All Men’s Day. Now it is officially called Defender of the Fatherland Day. Even though, now it is much more difficult to find a man who served in the Army, military attributes for this celebration are very popular.
Greeting cards featuring men in uniform, Kalashnikov assault rifles, "telnjashkas" (navy striped sweatshirt) and other military-related subjects are given to those who have only seen real combat in movies. There’s the sentiment of "OK, I’ll pretend that you are a defender and give you a toy gun and military clothes. Defend me, dear!"
But if your friend has served in the Army, is an officer or is from military dynasty then no jokes and no games. This day is taken very seriously and commemorated with solemnity and poise, as practically all generations of officers in Russia were involved in one or more wars. Yet as the evening progresses, there’s a good chance to hear real stories from real heroes.
First Feminists and Women’s Day
Yes, the first celebrations of the 8th of March were meetings of women fighting for their right to work, study and escape from home slavery. Soviets were pioneers of the women’s suffrage movement, giving women voting, education, sexual and working rights. Unfortunately, Russian women got all these rights on top of overly heavy responsibilities.
That’s why over the decades this holiday has gradually transformed from a celebration of women's rights to a more lighthearted holiday when all women "reconnect with their feminine side" and are gifted flowers, sweets, compliments and gifts. So, if the 23th of February is an Army celebration, the 8th of March is a celebration of a simple fact that one is female. If you are a girl — relax and have fun.You'll still have the rest of the year to show off your girl power.
How to Celebrate?
In the average office celebrating Men’s Day is simple. Girls bring some food (home-made or order a delivery) and cater lunch for the guys. If you are dating a Russian guy, you can pretty much keep your bases covered with a tasty dinner (think steak and home-made cake).
Celebrating Women’s Day is another story. If you live with a Russian girl, you’re expected to turn into a combination of Batman, Prince Charming and servant. You should give flowers, bring coffee to bed, cook breakfast, say how beautiful she is, take her to a restaurant and be the best version of yourself. At work or school, men are expected to bring flowers for all women that are part of their life.
If you call 8th of March the Day of the Matriarch, you wouldn't be VERY far from the truth.
The other semi-official name of this day is Mother’s Day. All people are expected to congratulate their mothers and grandmothers. Children make handmade gifts — often flowers made of different materials — and give them to their moms. Schools and preschools hold special concerts with songs dedicated to all moms. If you know Russian, there’s no way you’re walking out of there with a dry handkerchief.
Gifts: Socks, Flowers, Jewelry and Danger of the Frying Pan
Traditional presents for Men’s Day are socks. We could not find any traces or pre-history of that sacred gift, but if you are a man in Russia, it is impossible to escape getting a pair of socks on this day. Now the socks tradition is enriched with new gift options, such as a case of socks (enough to last a year) and even a tank made of socks.
Another safe option is a set of shower gel and deodorant and/or shampoo and aftershave. Numerous sets of different price and combinations are represented in any shop in Russia.
The third option is military-like clothes and toys.
And do not forget — home-made food is also considered as a gift. If you want to give a present to some regular or former officer, the best choice would be some high quality, strong alcohol. NEVER give champaigne unless you are asked to do it clearly and directly.
A traditional gift for the 8th of March is flowers and sweets. If you’re female, you’ll get them from your colleagues, classmates and even neighbours. Flower shops are empty for two weeks after Women’s Day.
If you are dating or married to a Russian girl, you are expected to give her much more than that. Jewellery, perfume, lingerie, cosmetics, purses, and shoes are always welcome — the easiest way is to just bring her to the store and get your credit card ready. Girls will always try to help you make the right choice by giving you hints in advance. If you hear something like: "Oh, dear, I saw such beautiful shoes at (name of the store)" or "My colleague has such a beautiful ring, she said she bought it at (name of the store), take note. Gadgets also make good presents.
Married woman often want some kitchen appliances such as a new washing machine or a dishwasher. But be careful: buy them only if she specifically asked for them. Be sure to add something nice and, of course, flowers to show her that she is your sweetheart, not just mother and wife.
And never, never, ever give her a frying pan or anything else to make her a better cook. She’s perfect already!
Why students give presents to their teachers? Do they love their lessons THAT much?
No, it’s all for the love of knowledge, or rather a way to be polite and show respect. Moreover, 8th of March is the annual pain-in-the-rear for parents. They must give presents to their kids' nurses, teachers, doctors, and coaches, and we’re not even talking the obvious candidates, such as teachers and headmistresses. Before the 8th of March every supermarket is crowded with thousands of women solving a problem of buying dozens of similar gifts, not too expensive, not too cheap, not too boring and not too intimate. Yes, the days before Women’s (including Mom’s) Day can be called Mom’s Nightmare.
Can I skip celebrating if I am not in love or in a relationship?
Practically no chance, unless you hide under your blanket for a week. If you work anywhere other than at home, you’ll be caught and forced to participate.
What if I am a girl and a guy gives me sweets and flowers on 8th of March? Does he?
It would be great to say: of course! Or he might just be cautious of the no-celebration consequences. Or just trying to be nice. So if a guy gives you flowers or sweets, feel free to take it with no strings attached. Don’t imagine (or be afraid of) your future wedding and start choosing names for your future children. Flowers are just flowers that day. But… anything can happen when the snow melts in Russia. Take the flowers and take a closer look.
